Have you ever shared a problem with your mates and it’s gone a little like this?
You start talking about a stressful or uncomfortable situation. You know – just to get a bit of feedback. Maybe it’s how you’re feeling about a breakup. Or perhaps there’s something bugging you that you just can’t seem to let go of. The reply?
‘Manup and grow a pair!’
It wasn’t the answer you were looking for. But it’s the usual one. The one you expected. So you shut up. And you don’t bring it up again.
You’re a man. So you don’t have time for things like feelings or deep conversations. You’re supposed to just get on with it and push those uncomfortable thoughts away. Ignore them. It’s what you were taught growing up, and you feel like it’s what society expects of you.
As if being born a man means you have these superpowers that enable to you brush off anything negative that comes your way.
These stereotypes couldn’t be further from the truth. Because they’re just that… stereotypes.
They’re outdated gender-based expectations that have been passed down through the generations – sadly creating a lot of harm. How do we know this? Because suicide rates among men is three times higher than women.
THREE TIMES
You can check the stats for yourself in the link above.
So, there’s got to be a reason, right?
The consensus from mental health charities like the Samaritans is that there are a few factors going on.
- Men find it harder to discuss their problems – As we’ve just highlighted, gender stereotyping is still very prevalent in today’s society. Social media has seen a rise in Influencers who promote these outdated stereotypes causing unnecessary pressure on men to feel like they have to behave and act a certain way.
- Drugs and alcohol misuse – Men are more likely to use drugs and alcohol as a coping mechanism. If they feel they can’t talk about it, then alcohol and drugs feel like an easy way to numb those uncomfortable feelings.
- Depression – Depression can often show up differently in men. Men experience more symptoms like sudden loss of control, aggression and risk taking.
Okay so this does paint a pretty gloomy picture. But as a man it’s important to be aware that the risks are higher for you so you can do something about it.
You can take control of the situation, move forward and feel better about your mental health.
First and foremost, your GP is the person to go to when you feel you’re struggling with your mental health. That can feel like a difficult conversation to have, but remember, they have these types of conversations every single day. It’s their job to look after you so please don’t think you’ll be turned away.
We know from the NHS’s statistics that less men are referred for mental health therapy than women because they find it hard to take that first step and see their GP. If you’d rather talk to someone anonymously online or check out some free resources, there are lots of places you can access help. You’re not alone.
Here are some online websites you can check out:
Samaritans
You can contact the Samaritans 24 hours a day on 116 123
You can also contact them by email and live chat (when it’s available) here: https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/
The volunteers at the Samaritans are there to listen and give you space and time to share your thoughts. They don’t offer advice, but they can refer you on to specialist organisations depending on your situation and needs.
JAAQ
JAAQ stands for ‘Just Ask A Question’.
JAAQ provides answers to questions from people who have lived experiences of everything from panic attacks to body dysmorphic disorder. Featuring famous sports professionals, celebrities and mental health experts. The platform is set up in a visual way, with lists of questions and video responses so you can find the answers you’re looking for easily. It’s a great platform for people who prefer video content to scrolling through pages of text.
Anxiety UK
Anxiety can show up for men at various stages of their life. Learning more about what Anxiety is and why it’s happening can be re-assuring. Anxiety UK have a wealth of resources online to help you manage your Anxiety. They also have the option to book a call or therapy session with one of their volunteers.
Young Minds
https://www.youngminds.org.uk/young-person/
The Young Minds website has clear navigation to find the support you’re looking for as a young person. From how your mental health can be affected by ADHD, to what a panic attack is. There’s a nice mix of text and video resources on the site. And if you’re a parent there’s a whole section on how to support your children with their mental health too.
At Seven Hair and Body, our Barbers in Peterborough are always here to listen. Talking is good for the soul. And sometimes all you need is someone to listen and get it off your chest so you feel leaving lighter – and not just because you left with less hair!
The banter we throw in – that’s free…
On a serious note; if you’re struggling please don’t struggle alone. Reach out to your GP or in an emergency call 999.
We all go through mental health struggles at some point in our lives and there are plenty of professionals out there ready to help you, even when you feel like your friends can’t.
Hopefully this resource will help you with whatever you’re going through right now. Feel free to share it with friends who might be looking for support. Just that one thoughtful share might be all someone needs to get them through a sticky moment in time.
Take care!
Team Seven
Whether you live in Peterborough, Stamford, or the surrounding areas, our barbers is based at the bottom of Werrington Village and easily accessible on your way home or to work with free parking.
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